Sunday, January 08, 2006

...and the days following.

Well, the past few days... or weeks.... have smoothed out. All is known, and relatively well. I got my grades in, and despite my own popular belief, I did NOT fail history. I think Dr. Schwartz is filled with more mercy than his test implied. Nevertheless, I'm quite pleased with the way my grades went. I think, finally, I am resigned to the fact that I'll be back... there... within a week. It's not that I don't want to see you all, I DO... I just don't want to face the circumstances that seeing you implies. i.e. Being back... there...
See, if it was you guys visiting, that'd be OK. But it's not.. oh well...

And now, the disputed question of the month: how the HELL am I going to face the coming semester? My best friend has left the college, I'm not on speaking terms with two of my other "friends", and my sister is now living off campus. It didn't feel like I was living so far away from campus last semester because I brought campus WITH me. Now? I don't know.. I get the feeling I'll spend more time on campus this coming semester than I EVER have... that is, unless I can get a ride to my sister's house any time I want. I'm being selfish, I realize - I'm making it seem like I have no other friends. This isn't even close to the case. I have more friends on that campus than I had for 17 years of my life combined. I know they'll be there to hang out, study, maybe even play a game of raquetball every now and again... But they have other people to entertain and grace their presence with! What do I want? I'm not even sure... maybe I just want to stay home.
Here's my fear: That I become yet another victim of the college, a recluse that is more of a memory than a presence that spends all my time holed up somewhere with my homework, finding nothing more important in my life than grades. On paper, that's simply ridiculous; everyone knows that I couldn't care less about grades, as long as it's above F. A pass is a pass is a pass, and all the other letters are just that: letters. A part of some abstract judgement system to tell you if you're better than someone else. Granted, everyone feels good when they improve, but you CAN'T STRESS OVER IT!! It's pointless! *sigh*... Now I've written way too much, and I need to get some sleep. But at least studying is something to do, I suppose.

Ugh... I think I've made myself sick.

In lighter news, I smell like pizza.
Wait, that's not news at all.
I've become loopy. With all that BS off my chest, I have nothing left to dwell on. With nothing left to devour, my brain has begun digesting itself, turning in upon itself like a black hole, which is EXACTLY what my brain is after LAST semester.


Pay no attention to this post, friends. It's unimportant, and kind of ranty.
Yours utterly,
The Hich

8 Comments:

Blogger Fidelio said...

I miss you, Joe.

8:55 AM  
Blogger Propter Quid said...

A pass is not a pass is not a pass. If you get too many c's you'll never be able to transfer out of Christendom. But I'm sure you already knew that.

Oh, and I understand the "I have many friends but the're all better friends with each other that with me" situation. Spend your freetime on a project that you enjoy. It's not healthy to spend 100% of your time around other people, trying to be important. Best not to become a celebrity. People who are celebrities iritate me.

God Bless

11:54 AM  
Blogger Scarcely Human said...

I wasn't trying to become a celebrity, just trying to figure out how to spend my time. I figure it will involve reading - LOTS of reading.

Transfering out of Christendom never crossed my mind. I suppose that's why I don't think it important.

2:37 PM  
Blogger Elizabeth said...

Get a life. Okay, so that is putting it extremely mildly.. Personally, I'm of the opinion that one shouldn't room with or fill the wing with (best) friends only, but that one should widen the horizons and live with those you aren't buddies with (yet).. you'll meet new people (by force, at the local sink), and you'll still have your friends.

Of course, you could decide that nothing but grades matter, and become the Hermit of St. Joe's..

As to how to cope I have three words: Offer it Up.

7:08 AM  
Blogger Scarcely Human said...

"THE" Hermit of St. Joe's? Aren't they ALL hermits?!

10:59 AM  
Blogger Propter Quid said...

Hey!

11:38 AM  
Blogger White Phantom said...

They are all hermits! :P hehe

Acutally, Joe, I've been planning on spending more time at GA. I mean, the top of GA. (I think if I spent more time in Joe & Eric's appartment, they'd make me pitch in for rent.)

Actually, I have a proposition for you. It involves you having a bit of moneies for groceries. But I think it might work out well.

3:11 PM  
Blogger White Phantom said...

Oh, and D is for diploma! :D

3:11 PM  

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